Songs You Haven't Heard In Fucking Forever

I've made an important decision today.

I'm going to make a mix CD. It has to be a CD for this to work properly. The plan doesn't have the same effect if it's a playlist or something like that.

I'm going to make a mix CD and fill it with one hit wonders from the nineties and other songs that you just don't hear much on the radio anymore, music that I don't listen to on a normal basis because I don't have the full album. We're talking stuff like "Got You Where I Want You" by The Flys. "Christian Woman" by Type O-Negative. "What I Got" by Sublime. Stuff like that. I'm going to grab a Sharpie and label it, "Songs You Haven't Heard In Fucking Forever." I'm going to put the CD in a player and listen to it once.

And then I'm going to throw it someplace hard to find where I would never look for it. And I'm going to leave it there until I forget that it's there at all. So then, two years later, when I'm emptying out some closet looking for my long lost something-or-other, I'll accidentally find it. And I'll see the label that says, "Songs You Haven't Heard In Fucking Forever" and I will not remember ever having made this mix CD.

So I'll pop it in a CD player and listen to the songs, and when they say,

I've got a dalmation.
I can still get high.
And I can play the guitar like a
Motherfuckin' riot.

my heart will fill with joy.